curlyblondflute's Journal

Wow it's been a really long time since i've updated this. So we had our private viewing of my grandfather on April 2 then the funeral was April 3 over 120 ppl showed up which was really nice. It was so hard having that last moment where the family says goodbye before they close the casket I cried so much then. In a way it still seems like he's not gone I guess b/c i'm not home, I really noticed it Easter/My family b-day party for me last wkend when he wasn't there. Idk it's just so tough now i don't have any grandfathers :( My grandma is doing really well though. I wonder now if he wouldn't have gotten that back surgery if he'd still be here b/c mom said that sepsis or blood infection from being in the hospital...they had him so medicated it was ridiculous i'm sure that didn't help.Our hospital sucks balls that's all i have to say they don't do anything for ppl they just over medicate them so they are in a comotos state. My grandpa was only 68 that's really not that old.Idk it just keep having these weird dreams and he's in them and around w/ my family idk anymore.

In happier news i went to visit my wonderful boyfriend for my b-day. That was so much fun. Justin took me to this really cute little italian restaurant and they had really good food and gave us so much.And it was really neat b/c they had empty wine bottles w/ candles on top that they lit when u sat down it was so romantic.

And i'm sooooooo happy we finally got him a ride to come this wkend so i can see him again since we don't end at the same time i won't see him till a wk after i get home which sucks but at least i get to see him for a wkend then 2 wks apart then i hope we get to spend lots of time together. I have two jobs this summer and a summer class i'm going to be going crazy bleh. But it'll be fun i guess my one job at the school i graduated from will be great and i get paid pretty good. And my dorney job well it'll be interesting and then the summer class bleh stat no fun at all. Oh well i need to go do some work that needs to be done to wrap up this semester yippee not...

Current Mood: tired

He passes away at 6:05 this morning. So we have a monday funeral this is so sad :(. That's all i wanna write right now i'm really upset i'm glad to at least be at home :(.

Current Mood: sad

This is the most horrible feeling ever. We know my grandpa is going to die everyone in my family is accepting it b/c we don't want him to suffer anymore but we don't know when it is going to happen. He was taken off the feeding tube and breathing tube today around 2 and the doctors say he could live 1 to 2 days that is it. I'm leaving thurs. around 1 to go home i need to be at home right now this is so hard on me. I hate having to miss classes but i need to be at home i need to be able to see him one last time but idk what's going ot happen. Tomorrow will be a busy day of packing and making arrangements with the registar's office and my professors. I was almost in tears today when i told my econ prof. i was going to be missing a test, i couldn't help it though. This past yr and a half has been so hard. I lost my dad's dad January 9, 2005 (i miss my grandpa), my great grandfather in october of 2005, and now my mom's dad in the next couple days it's so hard i can't stop crying. I don't know what to do. I'm just glad i have my friends here and a boyfriend that is really supportive.I just wanna be at home right now though be w/ my family. My grandma already wrote up the obituary and has a suite picked out for him. this hurts so bad :(

Current Mood: sad

So after talking to my parents we know that he's going to pass away sometime between tomorrow up to a few wks. He has a blood infection that is taking over his body and we don't want him to suffer anymore so tomorrow sometime after 12 they are going to take out the tubes (breathing and i think feeding) and let him pass when he is ready. I'm so sad right now i just wanna be at home and they won't let me well i guess i find out tomorrow if i get to come home or not they don't want me to see him like this becuase he looks really bad they want me to remember him for how he was. I feel so horrible b/c i haven't talked to him since the tues. i was home for spring break. I'm just so sad right now it def. doesn't get any easier the second time. I just hope that after they take out the tubes and stuff that he passes on and is not in pain anymore but we have to wait and see we're taking it one day at a time...i just wanna be home right now i wanna see him one more time and that one more time. This is so hard for me to deal w/ it seems like yesterday that my other grandfather died.

Current Mood: sad

soooo sad
I can't believe this my only grandpa left is dying. I might be going home Wed. or Thurs. i have so much this week but my grandpa is so sick i can't be 4 hrs away i wanna be at home with my family. Hopefully my parents will let me come home i'm not the type of person to just leave school but this is soemthing i have to do i wanna be able to say goodbye to him if that's what is comes down to which at this pt. in time it looks like it will. He has a blood infection and he's on a breathing tube after he was clinically dead on sat. :( which tomorrow they remove the breathing tube.. we think he's given up he's in so much pain...it's so hard being 4 hrs away i know i can't do anything at home but i want to at least be home so that i can be w/ my family i really need them right now i really appreciate my friends here and my wonderful boyfriend who are helping me cuz right now i'm a mess my dad's dad passed away a yr and almost 4 months ago and now my mom's dad is really sick. I can't stop crying i'm just relaly bummed out right now. Please pray for my grandfather if you read this...

Current Mood: sad

So today i went for my interview at dorney. I signed up to be a ride operator b/c of our vacation this summer being like 2 wks long and the fact that i need to take a summer class for my stupid minor grrrr and the fact that i had no counter part for like ever last yr. Well Rob interviewed me and he was like i'm disappointed that you signed up to be a ride operator b/c after talking to yomar he said u did a great job as a group sup. last yr i was like ok so he went and talked to josy about all of it and she oked my time off and everything. Josy called josh and got it oked through him. Josy said after working with me for how many years that she only has complimants about me. It's def. a good thing that they like me so much they were seriously making as many accomodations as possible for me to be a supervisor :-D..So i am group sup. at the laser which i'm def. ok w/. I get paid more too which helps b/c i need money badly PSU keeps uping tuition and i'm going to need lots of gas money for when i student teach. But anyway i'm off to fill out paper work for that place so that i can send it back to them. I love being in charge of a ride though hopefully this yr is better then last yr.

Current Mood: happy

My wonderful Wkend!!!
This is such a great wkend it's been almost a month since i've seen my snuggly bear. I really care about him so much but i just hate being away from him. I guess i've just gotten used to it by now but the leaving part is the worst. We had such a great wkend, we went to see final destination 3, wendy's w/ all my good PSU buddies, then we watched tv, lots of snuggling and watching movies and just being together. I love that so much i love being with him and i really want to marry him someday and i hope he feels the same way about me. Well i should do some much needed hw because i haven't done anything all wkend.

Current Mood: happy

My parents rock!
OMG my parents are the best. I'll explain later. First my parents caome this wkend and we stayed at a hotel went to hoss' friday nite did some shoppin. THen today they surprised me with a trip to IUP to visit my wonderful boyfriend. HOw awesome is that. My parents are the greatest ever! We had justin give us a grand tour of IUP and everything, then we went to Fire Mountain, after that we went to a couple stores, then back to his dorm and talked for a while. I'm so glad my parents like justin. It's so funny to see erika and justin, erika beats on him like he's a brother or something which is good they get along. I'm so glad i got to see him today and spend some time with him, I love him so much. Well i'm off to relax some more that's all for now.

Current Mood: loved

So I started classes on Monday and man do they suck. I don't like my edthp 441 class b/c it's going to be debate style which i so am not good at. My econ. class is actually ok the teacher seems really good and as of thurs. i understood what was goin on but we'll see if i continue to understand it. HIstory is ok but it's turning into more work then i thought. SPLED is ok it's interesting but not hard but going to be a lot of work. I haven't had KINES yet b/c my teacher is sick but we'll have that tuesday. literature class not horrible but ok. I think that's all my classes next fall i get to take 19 credits yay 7 classes that'll be tons of fun not. lol. oh well.

Oh the highlight of my wk was today when i talked to both my parents for a while and the best part of the day. Justin's parents took me out to lunch so i got to spend like 2 hrs. w/ him and his family it was great. I really do love him.

Current Mood: cheerful

We celebrated our one year anniversary yesterday. We went to the mall and walked around a bit then we went to Red Lobster for a lunch/dinner type thing. It was such a great anniversary he got me a teddy bear from build a bear and he got me roses.It was so cute. I love him so much not seeing him for 2 months is going to be so difficult but we'll get through it.

I had to pack tonite :( i don't wanna go back at all i love being home and not having to deal w/ school crap but oh well i gotta do it. And i'm pissed $489 for books this semester the bookstore is a rip off!

On another note looking for another summer job cuz i don't wanna go back to dorney if i don't find another job i'm back at dorney and that would suck. So if u have any ideas tell me :-D

Current Mood: thankful

Happy New Year!
Wow another year already. I have to say this year has definitely been a good one, meeting someone i want to spend the rest of my life with, getting closer to friends at college, realizing some ppl r just not worth my time and being ok with that, finding out how much i really missed being in the classroom, making the dean's list for the spring semester and now the fall, i just hope this year brings more dean's lists but we will see cuz i'm already taking 400 level classes which most ppl don't do till their junior year at least.

I really don't wanna go back to school though i love being home and not having to do anything just relaxing spending time with my friends from home and my wonderful boyfriend, sleeping in,just not thinking about school. Watching some great movies spending time with my family. I really miss being at home when i'm at school i miss my family (yes even my sister i miss her) and eating home cooked food and sleeping in my own bed some friends from back home yes i miss all that stuff but it's good to be away it makes me appreciate those things all the more when i do come home. Anyway this is it for now. HOpe everyone had a happy new year.

Current Mood: happy

Yay i have all my grades now. I have a B+ in geography, an A- in BBH and PSY., an A in BISC and EDPSY. so my GPA for this semester is a 3.77 (Dean's List again :-D) and my cumulative GPA is a 3.45 so i will def. be great for getting in the major. I'm so happy and it's been so nice being at home i love it. I just wish Justin was home. I miss him so much. At least this storm will be out of the way so he can come home safe. I can't wait for jan. 4 that'll be our one yr. anniversary :-D. Well off to make dinner for tonite :-D

Current Mood: happy

I have great friends!
So Friday nite jess, jill (not suitemate), adrienne, and i went to Jill's house had some pizza just hung around. Jill's mom is so nice she's going to make us dinner some nite next semester and Adrienne's mom said we can come over anytime. We had lunch at Jill's grandparent's house. Then after meeting everyone's parents we went to walmart we wanted to do stupid stuff but the place was packed. Then we went to denny's for dinner. After dinner I went to church can u believe that lol...well it was to see jill and adrienne in their x-mas play. I'm going to miss those girls over break we always have tons of fun when we hang out...pictures to come on facebook :-D

Anyway so far i have an A- in bbh, an A- in psy., an A in bisc still waiting for CI, edpsy. and geography. Tomorrow is my one and only test then i'm getting my krispy kream care package and heading home i'm so excited to go home. I miss my family and i get to see justin more over break yay but he doesn't come home till sat. so i won't see him till sun. :( oh well...i'm off to relax till my early bed cuz i have to get up at 7 bleh oh well i'll survive :-D

Current Mood: happy

Snow!
So last wkend i went to IUP on Friday it was so bad driving on 422 but it was a fun wkend it was nice to just relax.

This wk kinda sucked i have a test on wed. in bisc, and two tests today in bbh and psy. We had a 2 hr delay today cuz we got 6inches of now (back home my parents said it was about 8inches bleh- and there is a chance of another storm next friday :( ) but tonite i'm going to my friends house to spend the nite...girl's nite movies and junk food great combo lol. Anyway should be fun even though i'm exhausted from this wk. Oh well off to finish getting ready to go...sweatpants and hoodies good times :)

I'm sooooo ready to come home tuesday for me thank god we had that bisc final wed. so now i can come home after geography final on tues. yay. I'm ready to sleep in my own bed see my family see justin.

I guess that's all for now nothing really new in my boring life....

Current Mood: tired

Well i get to go to IUP this wkend i'm excited see the boyfriend :-D. Well let's see what else Thanksgiving was good it was nice to get away. Then back here busy busy busy. I get to go home tues. dec. 13 i'm excited to go home for a long break.I'll be so glad when this semester is over w/. And my third graders are so great i'm going to miss them one wk w/ them yet :( makes me sad. well i'm off to bed lots of work to catch up on tomorrow.

Current Mood: happy

Wow it's been a little while since i've updated. Well let's see well we had some excitement here in little Altoona this past wednesday. There was a convicted murderer who excaped from the Altoona Hospital and was running around altoona. He seriously went right by campus to get to the road he was captured on. PSU Altoona went on lock down so classes were cancelled for the day and we were not allowed to leave our dorm for like an hr till they got him. It was scary but after it was all over kinda funny. THe guy seemed real stupid...he was convited of murder in montgomery county after he kidnapped some one in macungie idk the whole story but yeah real weirdo and ok they found him hiding under a blanket the guy seemed really stupid he was only "free" for less then 3 hrs. but there was lots of excitement around here. And no one was hurt he had a bloody nose but idk what that was from but he's back in jail now :-D...and tonite i got to see charlie and the chocolate factory for free from SAB here and we got popcorn and soda that was a good movie that's teh second time i've seen it now. Well this wkend it's catch up on work/ study for tests/ girl's nite tomorrow nite yay then mon. classes and my wonderful bf comes to spend the nite then we go home on tues. after my one class bleh 9am oh well then we get home fast. Well off to watch tv and relax after the long wk.

Oh yeah i went to school twice this wk saw my great third grade class. One girl drew me a sea turtle picture and she doesn't want me to leave even though i have two more times going yet but it was def. hard telling her i'll only be with them two more school days (which is the two tues. after break) they're really great kids i love that class i really don't wanna leave but i won't have time to drive up there. Maybe i'll try to get up there one day if the weather isn't bad idk. OH well i'm really done now :-D

Current Mood: giggly

Let's Go State!
So yesterday was tons of fun even though i didn't get a single thing done this wkend and have two tests tomorrow :(. Oh well. Let's see i was lucky enough to get a ticket friday nite for $50 to go to the last home football game (which we won PSU 35 Wisconsin 14). SO now PSU should be #1 in the big ten. The road trip up to state was great Jess drove we sang the whole way (we're such bad singers but that's ok), I think we sang 'Hey Baby' from Dirty Dancing like 10 times...i love that song hee hee wish the Blue Band would've played it more. Our seats were great though, we sat right behind the blue band well second row behind the blue band which was nice. It was nice that the four of us got to go to the game (me, jess, adrienne and jill). I think next yr i'll buy season student tickets. I had such a great time even though i had no idea what was going on most of the time :-D. After the game we went to my aunt's house for pizza that was fun i guess more interesting then anything. Oh well i had such a great wkend.

Friday was even fun we went to the mall had subway for dinner, and picked up stuff at martins. The mall was crazy (jill, jess and i went there adrienne had to work :( )Fun times this wkend but now it's time to get down to some real work!

Current Mood: happy

So i get this call at like 3 friday afternoon from Justin (just before they left to come out here) asking if i wanted to go back w/ them (well i drive seperate) to IUP w/ them. So yeah i spent a surprise wkend at IUP. It was a great wkend but i got nothing done so that'll be this wkend :(.

Today was such a great day. I went to my school for the first time. My teacher is great, she actually graduated from IUP which is cool so we talked all about stuff like that. Her class is great 21 third graders. They really are a great class they have so much energy it's funny. I had so much fun today. I can't wait to go back next wk cuz next wk we go on a field trip yay :-D I can't wait to start student teaching but that's like forever away :(...oh well

But now i'm pissed nothing ever goes right when it deals w/ my bf and getting rides out here :(

Current Mood: sad

This totally sucks this wk has gone from sucky to even more sucky...Justin is supposed to come get the flowers but they have to come friday nite well sat. would've been better but he can't cuz teh driver person has plans...that's the problem w/ a boyfriend who doesn't have a car..now i'm not going to see him for like a month :( i'm so sad this totally sucks...and i'm not even in my major at school here this blows sooooo much i don't even wanna talk about it :(

Current Mood: sad

So i wanna go home so bad. I hate it here at PSU Altoona. I hate my classes, I hate being away from home and Justin, I thought i had real friends but i guess that's not true. I really found that out tonite, which makes me not want to be here anymore. I think everyone in my suite doesn't like my boyfriend and i get this AIM that we're kissing to loudly but we weren't even kissing we were watching tv and talking,and it doesn't help that two of the suitemates were talking behind my back i'm not stupid. I don't get it! People who i thought were my friend really aren't and just because they don't like my boyfriend they're i don't even know what. It really upsets me i'm so sick of this place i just want this yr to be over w/ maybe i'll transfer somewhere else, I could always go home and finish my degree there I know PSU Lehigh Valley has Ele. Ed as a 4yr. degree. Idk it just sucks a lot.I had such a good day till that i really did my edpsy. class got canceled, BBH and PSY. were already cancelled, i ended up w/ 3 classes instead of 6 that made for a great day. I actually think i did well on my BISC test, I got to see justin for a bit today which was really great made me very happy since idk if i'll get to see him now till Thanksgiving break which really sucks. I just need to get out of Altoona for a while clear my head and stuff but that def. won't happen unfortunately, idk anymore this just sucks a lot and idk what to do.

On a happy note i got to meet justin's uncle he's nice and he has some really cute animals the doggies were cute. Well i guess that's all for now.

Current Mood: sad

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